2009-09-29 - 7:08 p.m.

Our new neighbors are from "the 909". The 909 also called "the Inland Empire" is the area east of LA and Orange County where a lot of people still live before you hit the desert. Ever since I moved here I have heard LA and Orange County people make fun of all the people who live in the 909. By the way, 909 is the area code. Until the last few weeks I thought all the derogatory remarks were just LA and OC people being snobs because obviously if you don't drive a really expensive car and live for expensive crap like Coach purses you must be a terrible person. But now I have encountered people from the 909. Our neighbors and their entourage of friends who are around all the time are very interesting. They are loud, tattooed, white, and totally ghetto. The girls like to beat up other girls and then loudly brag about it. They have an ancient, decrepit van permanently parked in front of our apartment and with a flat tire. Since they moved in our driveway has been hit by taggers and the local police are unfamiliar with the symbols they left behind. The friends stand around by the street all the time and do nothing. The very young couple with a new baby who are our actual neighbors have regular, daily fights where they scream at each other. Usually this happens around 6 AM and the girl screams at the guy and accuses him of cheating on her with "that whore". It's super classy. And now I just found out one of their friends is moving into Rob's old apartment on the other side of us. The friend is a woman with a mullet who cackles when she laughs. It's the only mullet I've seen since I moved to Orange County. I thought when I moved out of my frat house of an apartment I was moving to a quiet place, but no instead I've moved to a place with neighbors who would probably kick my ass if I looked at them the wrong way. Awesome